Therapist Shows HOW To Set Boundaries & Protect Yourself From TOXIC People! | Nedra Glover Tawwab

Spot the toxic waste before it gets too close

  • Jittery, nervous energy.
  • Constant whining and complaining
  • Clinginess and dependency
  • Criticism, usually aimed everywhere
  • Negative or cynical worldview
  • And in extreme cases, abuse
    • Trust your gut– if someone makes you upset and uncomfortable, make some space
    • Pay attention to body language and tone of voice.¬†Listen to the sounds made, more than what people actually say. You can hear it when someone is just going through the motions. How do people relate to you? What do they seem to be thinking when they speak?
    • Bad body language looks like a sullen, sulky teenager — shoulders down, lack of eye-contact, big, hostile gestures, etc.[2]
    • Good body language looks like George Washington across the Delaware: back straight, chin up, shoulders back,
    • Anger, shouting, and negative criticism are major signs of a toxic personality. Angry people sometimes need a lot of help, but it’s not your job to be their punching bag. It is definitely not your job to try and fix them! Staying around a person like this will cause you to become angry too. So kick back and find someone else to talk to: you’ll have a lot more fun.
    • People who have control over their emotions don’t usually feel the need to shout, so watch out for the loud ones.
    • Watch out for quiet, simmering anger as well. Some people won’t say much, but will use poor body language and bottle it up instead. These people lash out at odd times, when anger doesn’t seem called for. Luckily, this is basically a neon “Personal BioHazard” sign.
    • If you have to work with angry people, never stoop to anger — you’ll just rile them up further. Keep in professional, polite, and quick, and just walk out if they lose their temper. They’ll hate you for it, but they’ll learn their lesson sooner or later.